In “Mandatory Evacuation Zone,” Felice Aull has gathered 63 beautifully crafted poems in which she examines the intricacies of language and loss, of grief and healing.  Each of the book’s five sections considers these themes in slightly different ways, always in language that is understated, vivid, and exact.  In Section I, we read poems that focus on the author’s complicated family history and her early loss of homeland.  In “Tracings” (page 15), an unknown relative (thanks to online genealogy searches) reaches the narrator and wants to meet her.  She, however, only wishes to learn “. . . how my parents / and my infant self / made our tortuous way out . . . . ” Brought in infancy from Germany to America, the author suffers the loss of both native homeland and native language (“Notes from an Alpine Vacation” page 16).  She searches photos of her mother and ponders museum note cards illustrated by Holocaust survivors (“Museum Notecards” page 18), imagining what she can’t quite know and yet can’t quite forget.  

Section II finds the narrator as a young woman in American, awakening to sexuality (“Gay Blades,” “Camp Counselors Make Out,”  “On the Staircase” pages 29-31), becoming a wife and mother, and then a grandmother.  A grandchild’s birth is both joyful and yet another “slipping toward / the edge of separation” (“Daughter in her Eighth Month” page 37). 

In Section III, the author turns her gaze to observations of the world around her, around us, aware of how many come to loss and death.  “Be prepare to mourn,” she tells us in “Disaster in October” (page 49), and in the moving poem, “I Saw the Smoke,” re-visions September 11th in words stripped of sentimentality and therefore made more powerful. 

Sections IV and V confront bodily loss through aging and illness, noting how, in so many ways, we try both to capture and to let go: “You snap photo upon photo / hoping to grasp and preserve / what cannot be grasped” (Capturing Alaska” page 66).  We learn of the most personal losses in poems of biopsies, surgeries, and chemotherapy.  When facing the unknown, every event might seem to hold a prediction.  In “Stunning Blows,” a doorman stuns a mouse, claims that it’s dead.  But the narrator, aware of the wages of time, writes, “But I still see it, like death, / moving toward me” (page 81).  At the book’s end, we return to language, how it too can leave us (“Forget That” page 90).  Yet in the collection’s final, gentle poems, the poet is “able, finally / to walk past the park’s redbud tree / without weeping” (“Immunity” page 96).

Although there are many poems that confront loss both recalled and experienced. grief for self and others, illness and the unknown in this collection, there are also poems of great acceptance and ultimate joy: “These gifts and losses, every year, mine” (“The Key to Gramercy Park” page 98).  The poems in “Mandatory Evacuation Zone,” show us how poetry can help us to “declutter” (see “Divesture” page 99) and release, and at the same time, hold on to and embrace.

Kelsay Books, California 2017: 100 pages

Felice’s website: https://www.feliceaull.com/

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A previous version of this review was published in the NYU Literature, Arts, and Medicine Database

Herein I argue not only that video games are an epistemically valid artform but also that the health humanities should actively incorporate them into critical discussions. As any diligent qualitative researcher would say, such arguments must position the writer, so I’ll begin by briefly describing how I came to this topic.  

At the time of writing, I am a resident in psychiatry in New York City. I grew up and completed my formal education in the Middle Atlantic region, and video games have been a part of my life the entire way. As a child, I was fortunate enough to play both handheld (e.g., Nintendo Game Boy) and console (e.g., PlayStation) systems. I gravitated toward role-playing games (RPGs), those in which the player acts as a particular character to live through ​​that character’s narrative (often a hero’s journey). I especially loved fantasy and science fiction RPGs, which mirrored my passions in literature. Aesthetically, they transported me to rich worlds with stunning visuals. Practically, they taught me skills I didn’t realize I was learning (e.g., map reading, orientation in a digital space, manual dexterity). Emotionally, they carried me through incredibly challenging moments, providing a mentally stimulating escape when my child and adolescent brain needed time to process.  

The messaging had always been clear: if you want to do nothing with your life, then go ahead and play video games in your parents’ basement. Whenever I heard this, I became smaller. Despite my life aspirations and dreams of being a physician, I couldn’t help remembering that I was indeed the child living in his parents’ basement playing video games. I felt I was one step away from failure at any moment. I still enjoyed my games immensely, but I constantly created timelines for when I would “give them up.” Video games became a vice, a tumor that I needed to excise lest it devour me. 

But I couldn’t.  

Every time I attempted to leave video games in my past, something brought them back: the newest installation in my favorite series, a need for variation in my leisure activities, an offer to play a collaborative game remotely with new friends, a need for active escape. Still, I kept it secret. I talked about it with my closest friends, but only if they too struggled with the same addiction.  

Until one day I stopped. I made the active choice to talk about it with my peers, co-residents, and supervisors if it naturally presented itself. And, miraculously, the shame started to ease. I realized that video games nourish my life in ways that other activities do not. In some respects, they offer the narrative of literature, the visuals of movies, and the interactivity of board games all wrapped in one beautiful image. I started to question why I could spend countless hours reading or watching shows without concern but immediately felt guilty when I played a game. This piece, and subsequent series, seeks to challenge this socialized notion that video games are a waste of life force.  

Just like other forms of media, video games both comment on and transform the human experience. Video games have expanded into innumerable genres and formats. Gone are the days when you needed a desktop computer or a gaming system to play; the size and pervasiveness of the mobile game market is near incomprehensible. Video games have become a part of mainstream culture. It’s time we change our viewpoint on them and treat them like the critical pieces of media they are. Through MedHum, we will join in rewriting this narrative, highlighting the value of video games within the health humanities. First on our docket is an open-world game called Forspoken, a game with a bit of controversy in its reception. Stay plugged in to read it soon! 

Web image by Aditya Sethia